Long Distance Relationships

[joanamrf]

Anyone ever been in one? I'm sure like anything else if you REALLY put effort into it, it works, but would anyone like to share their experiences?

Jo

[southernbaby (deleted)]

`I've been in a few before. It can be good and bad. It can be good because, like the internet, you can get to actually know someone's personality without the 'fear' of how somethings going to look or sound in person. On the flip side though it can crazy hard. As human beings we want to be able to experience each other, see each other, go out with each other, touch (even just hand holding or kissing), etc... So that tends to create longing and loneliness in a way. If its a situation where you both agree you want to make that choice to wait for each other and hopefully have a date set to see each other it can make it thrilling. Then again more times then not if one of you aren't willing to make that choice and stick to it or there's no possibility of meeting in sight... the loneliness and longing can make a person feel more attracted to or want someone closer more. The best advice I could give is ask your self a very important question: Are YOU the type of person who can commit & be faithful to someone without seeing them even in stressful situations for prolonged periods of time (such as months or even a year)? The answer to that question should be your guide as to how to proceed.

[daisybell00 (deleted)]

`I was in a long distance relationship for 3 years - 265 miles between us. Was pretty hard going at times and expensive! They can work though, as 11 years later we are still together =] I decided to move myself and 2 girls to the South of England and as they say the rest is history, though not without its problems which is understandable.
I do think though that you need to be together a lot longer before you commit to anything. Because you get to spend so little time together, it takes that much longer to know if they are the right one to make a commitment too.

[joanamrf]

Thank you for sharing

Jo

[ave09 (deleted)]

`6 years ago I've been in a relationship long distance, but it never worked out, yes I went to see her but didn't last long, plus gas is too much money to travel. Any suggestion. not a drinker or bar person, But enjoy my walks

[debicakes77 (deleted)]

`I had 2 and they could have worked if the one didnt make me choose between my family or him. That relationship lasted almost 2 years and he was in England...The second one lasted 2 1/2years and he was in Ohio. We got engaged. He didn't want to set goals to be together and I wanted to at least start making plans and goals. Sorry didn't feel like he really wanted us to be together. There is a safety and fantasy with long distance relationships. You choose what you want to see and hear and there is a comfort in knowing you have someone but also limited freedom of not dealing with them.. If that makes any sense.

[charismatic (deleted)]

`The hardest part about a long-distance relationship is the transition period between when it's new and fun and when you start really having to put work into it to make it right. When you don't see each other often enough to really get comfortable with each other and every time you see each other again you're excited and happy... but there's very slow progress. I don't feel like that's an omen saying it'll never work. I just believe that long-distance relationships move forward in a much less rapid rate than other relationships. At the same time, I don't know that I'd have as much patience for getting to know someone if I didn't expect that to an extent. make sense?

[toucherpudge (deleted)]

`I've had 2 and they both lasted over 2 years but were torturous! You live for phone calls , emails, gifts, and texting and you almost feel like you're gonna die because you don't have a mini cam to tote around with you or have them to sleep with at night.

It's do-able, but it sucks.

[amberalert (deleted)]

`I was in a "complicated" long distance relationship.

I met a guy on a random site (it was not a dating site), and we clicked right away. We were both hesitant to go beyond a friendship because we had never met in person and neither of us had ever tried an online or long distance relationship, but we clicked so well and after a few weeks we decided to become officially exclusive. We were exclusive for about a year, despite not having met due to both of our hectic schedules and the timing never being right, but we talked every single night for hours on end so it made the distance thing less hard for the time being.

About a year into it, his mother passed away suddenly. It completely changed his world and we decided a relationship wouldn't be good for him for the time being or for me since he needed time to grieve. Since his mother's passing about a year ago he has not had the urge to date or get into a relationship with me or anyone else, and we have been great friends since.

Him and I are still great friends and we still talk everyday for hours at a time. So I guess an online/long distance relationship didn't necessarily work out for me, but if he does come around to wanting to date again and I'm interested at that time then I guess it could still work out, but for now we are strictly friends and I think that's how it is going to stay, and at this time both him and I are fine with that.

I do know a couple that met online and lived across the country from one another, and they lived apart for about 3-4 years before moving in together, and they got engaged recently. My aunt also met my uncle, who lived in Australia at the time, in a chatroom and they have been married for 10+ years now. So it is possible. It really depends on the people in the relationship and what both people want. Constant communication helps, along with both people being clear on what they want and expect to come from the relationship in terms of a time frame on when to meet or if the long distance thing works for the time being.

[storitime]

`Distance only makes the heart grow fonder